I was abducted by aliens. What’s your excuse?

September 14, 2009

AlienAbduction

A sentiment suitable for all occasions, available on t-shirts and other stuff at my shop at CafePress.


To thine own clone be true

September 14, 2009

There are times I wish I had a clone of myself. (Forget the inconvenient fact that it would have to be grown from a baby to an adult and would not be able to act for me for 20 years or so – let’s pretend I could have one that would instantly be a duplicate of me.) It would be so nice to have the clone do the things that I don’t have time to do or don’t want to do.

Of course, if I don’t want to do something, my clone, being a duplicate of me, wouldn’t want to do it either. So we would have two of us not doing the thing that needs to be done.

And since we would both like the same things, we might wind up competing against one another for stuff. Or for people – what if my best friend hung out with my clone more than with me? Or mom liked my clone best?

Worst of all, what if we started arguing about which of us was the real me? I mean, I would know that I was, but my clone would probably really believe that she was the original. And then there’s the whole issue of using a clone for spare parts. What if it was the clone that needed an organ from me?

*sigh* I guess it would just be too complicated after all. And – oh dear – I just had another thought. What if I didn’t like my clone? Now that’s a scary thought.


In case of emergency, don’t expect me to be of any help

September 11, 2009

InCaseOfEmergency

I always have the best intentions, I really do, but I’m just not good in emergencies. So please don’t have an emergency when I’m around. Thank you.

If you relate to this sentiment, I have put it on t-shirts and other stuff at my shop at CafePress.


Let the dust bunnies prevail

September 10, 2009

I am not a good housekeeper. I have no problem admitting it. I would rather spend my time creating designs and doing other stuff than cleaning a house that only starts getting dirty again the minute I am finished. In spite of this I do manage to keep up with the basics of dusting and sweeping and vacuuming and such. But the nooks and crannies of my home do not bear inspection. I confess that in those dark places even the dust has dust on it, and the cat fur is no doubt present in enough quantity to make a whole ‘nother cat or two. And as far as spider webs are concerned, I have simply given up and let the spiders live in peace.

One more confession; I have let an army of dust bunnies breed to deal with that pesky monster under the bed. And I haven’t seen him for years now, so it must be working.


Caffeine fiends

September 10, 2009

I hold a most lonely position in the world – I do not drink coffee. Everyone I know consumes it, at home, at work, out in the world. Some of them can’t function without it. So, in honor of all of you caffeine consumers, I have created a bunch of coffee designs and put them on t-shirts, mugs and other stuff.

Caffeine Loading

Caffeine Loading

InsertCoffee

Insert coffee before assigning work

MustHaveCoffee

Must Have Coffee

StartWorking

I’ll start working as soon as the coffee does


How do you know when you are thinking outside the box?

September 9, 2009

When people refer to “thinking outside the box”, what do they mean? What box are they talking about? Who decides which box one should think outside of? If you are inside the box, are you aware of being inside it? If you are outside, is it possible to *not* think outside the box? How big is the box, anyway? And how far do you have to go to get your thinking outside it? What if you are in a different box than the one someone is telling you to think outside of? Wouldn’t you be thinking outside their box but inside yours? Will people recognize that you are thinking outside the box, or will they not even notice? What if your box is older or newer than someone else’s box? What if all the boxes are so close together that there is no room between them? Do you wind up thinking inside someone else’s box if you think outside yours? And who put all those darn boxes there anyway?


My fairy godmother is broken

September 9, 2009

FairyGodmother

Well, she’s just not working properly any more, and I don’t know where to get her fixed. Time to trade her in for a new one, I guess.

“My fairy godmother is broken” is available on t-shirts and other stuff at my shop at CafePress.

I also have more fairy godmother designs in the Riffs section of my shop.